We met!

Our birth mother (I'll refer to her by her initials, BK) is priceless! We had a great time. There was little conversation at first...we were all so nervous. But, I left the meeting with no regrets and nothing was left unsaid. There were two highlights of the conversation. I told her I felt a lot of pressure in our meeting. I wanted to soak up as much of her as I could because I knew this was the one chance I had to get any answers to questions our little boy might someday ask. She was easy to talk to and told me to ask away. I want to accurately portray her to our boy and I told her I did not want to put words in her mouth, or try to communicate her situation without knowing all the facts. I know someday he will ask "Mommy, why did she give me up?" So my question was, "Why are you placing him up for adoption?" She paused a moment and replied. "I want him to have a mom and dad. A family. I cannot give him that. He deserves a family and it would not be fair to keep him in hopes one will come along. I already have a son without a father and it's not a good situation." She complimented us and went on to tell us why she picked us. Then later in the conversation..."We want you to know your name will be openly talked about in our home. He will always know who you are and your name will be honored. We want him to know about you...what do you want him to know?" There was a moment of anticipation as we waited for her answer. She said, with her hands rubbing her belly, "I want him to know he has changed my life. If I were not pregnant, I would have never walked thru the doors of Hannah House and would still be living in addiction. He saved my life. God did not just put a baby in my belly, He has put something in my heart." She knows Jesus now because of the love and Truth Abba Adoption and Hannah House shared with her, and all because she chose life for this baby. Those are the highlights. There were so many realities in BK's past we learned that were so sad. She has been through a rough season....a season that lasted 15 years. In spite of all of that, God's glory still shines! He has set her apart now. He dug deep into a pit of sin and pulled her out of the darkness. And, now she walks with Him! She talked about what she is learning and reading in the Bible; and, she referred to Jesus as her friend. She shared what she wants to pursue after the baby is born, her goals and how she wants to help others with her testimony.

Have you ever met someone or seen a person and thought "they are hopeless, they are a lost cause, they are too hard and far gone, they would never stop what they are doing or desire the things of God?" Not necessarily because you doubt God, but because you think there is no way that person would EVER repent of their sin?...I don't know...but I think I probably would have thought that about BK. If I knew her before, I may have thought she was too hardened, too closed, too lost to even be interested in the person of Jesus. I really do not even like thinking about what judgements I would have made in the depths of my heart...BUT, I am thankful for the hope she has given me. Some think we are blessing someone because we are adopting a baby, the truth is we are blessed. Not just by this child, but by getting to be a part of this woman's story. I see my God even bigger now because of the work He has done in her life...Thank you BK for blessing ME! We love you and can't wait to meet our little boy.